After seven years on Xanga, I'm blowing it a kiss good-bye.

You can now find me at: http://abbasgirlandthefamily.blogspot.com/

Blogger has lots more features and it is also much easier to comment over there. I hope you'll join me at the new site - thanks for reading!

Xanga-baby, good night.

With joy and sadness, Gent and I announce the blessing of a baby and the excruciating pain that comes with the loss of preborn life. We found out soon after Christmas that we were expecting; the baby would have been born around September 11. Ironically, my first prenatal appointment was scheduled for the afternoon of January 21, and we lost the baby at home that morning. Physically I am fine and the whole experience passed naturally with little pain. But our hearts are broken.

As Christians, we believe every life--no matter how brief--is created by God. He had a plan for our baby's short life, though right now we don't understand. The Bible tells us that even the life of a sparrow is not forgotten by God (Luke 12:6). We know the Lord has not forgotten us or abandoned us, and our baby's life was not for nothing. But we are hurting.

It was very difficult to keep it together at the doctor's office, but God's grace was sufficient. It was so hard to have my ultrasound, with nothing to see but emptiness, and watch the other young couple in the office leave with their baby's first pictures in hand, huge smiles on their faces, and joyful dreams shared under their breath. But to my friends who are expecting or have little ones already, know that we rejoice with you over your family! Please don't let our sadness dampen your joy.

We ache, with arms that will never hold our baby or hear it cry. There are booboos we will never kiss and smiles we will never see. But we also know our baby will never experience pain or suffering. Our baby is in heaven, with the Lord, blessed with a complete life that never experienced the hurt that accompanies life on earth.

We trust that Jesus is a great nanny, and our Father God the best Father of all.

Please pray with us as we grieve. We won't ever get over our loss, or forget our baby's life. But with the Lord's help we will learn to cope, to grow, to live.

PS - I'd love to hear from you by email or snail mail, but please don't call. The loss is too painful to talk about right now.

One of my new year's resolutions is to continue exploring new foods. Last year I learned to like fresh tomatoes, brussels sprouts, peaches, kale, carrots, and mango, among other things. I realized I was always eating the same fruits and veggies, and how boring is that! So I pick up random things in the produce aisle and then figure out how to prepare them. This year is off to a great start with tangerines. Next on the list is greens. I've never really eaten them, but I say there's no time like the present to begin! What kind of Southern girl am I, anyway?

In other news, I just have to give a shout-out to my husband and his awesomeness. It has been so cold and I am so over it. After new year's I really have no reason for winter anymore. Spring, come early! I digress. My husband has walked the dogs every day this past week and he's going to keep it up until it gets above 30 degrees. We usually somewhat take turns, but lately that has all gone out the window. He bundles up and gets the puppies tired out. Thanks, honey!

Maybe next week I'll have a real post . . .